5 Tips for How to Let Go of the Past and Move Forward

Do you struggle to practise how to let go of the past? Are you holding onto memories of past events that cause you great emotional pain without realising it? If so, you are far from alone. Learning how to move forward can be emotionally loaded and a really tricky road to navigate. 

Dwelling on the past and associated feelings of guilt, shame, and grief is annoyingly commonplace. The past is a known quantity, whereas the future is unknown, which sometimes feels daunting. We are wired so that we hold onto what is familiar, even when this does not benefit us.

Negative experiences are often linked with intense emotion. As a result, this information makes a lasting impression. To move on, we must make a conscious decision to fight against our biological predisposition to imprint memories in this way. Learning how to let go of the past isn’t always easy, but your emotional health will thank you many times. 

Allow Yourself to Feel Negative Emotions

Many fear feeling negative emotions, such as grief, anger or sadness. The problem is that the flow of letting go is disrupted by trying to shut these emotions out, and these same emotions can become trapped. In some cases, the refusal to work through and process past trauma results in this pain being re-lived every day, which is collectively everyone’s worst nightmare. 

In time, this can lead to the development of a psychological disorder. It is, therefore, vital that you don’t fight against what your brain and body need to feel. If you’re trying to master how to let go of past mistakes, remember that none of us is perfect, no matter how much we try. Only by doing the emotional work, which can be arduous, will relief and long-lasting contentment be possible.

Counteract Painful Thoughts With a Positive Message

Instead of telling yourself that you are so unlucky or repeatedly asking why these bad things happened to you, reframe the past. Tell yourself that you were fortunate to survive past events or that you’re on a path better suited to you now. In short, condition your mind to your advantage to stop the self-torture. 

Accept that life can be random and is rarely fair. We are not in control of various aspects of our lives, yet we can alter our mentality, which gives us power. Knowing this allows us to move forward and escape the toxic psychological loop. 

Get Away and Move Forward

If you find yourself battling to let go, sometimes the only thing that cuts it is a fresh start in a new area, surrounded by different people. Creating distance from a place or person can do mental wonders as you’re not constantly reminded in little ways of potentially painful past events. 

You may find that the current area you’re living in fails to excite you or feels overly familiar, and naturally, consider it’s time to uproot. Life isn’t forever, and it’s essential to recognise that variety and new challenges are vital for good emotional health. Whilst it may feel overwhelming initially, realise that the long-term benefits are more than worthwhile. If you don’t like your new living setup, you can always return to what feels more comfortable. 

Accept That You May Not Get an Apology

If a painful part of your past is another person’s behaviour, you must accept that closure may not always be straightforward. If this person repeatedly hurts you, chances are they’re not hot on emotional empathy. They will therefore fail to see their wrongdoing, as they cannot consider your feelings. 

Waiting on an apology slows your healing process and prevents a healthy move forward. Sometimes, we need to accept that not everyone is capable of change, and it’s not your responsibility to fix that individual. Focus on the things you are in control of or can change, forgive yourself, and learn how to let go of past mistakes will come naturally. Everything outside of your control is irrelevant as it’s not serving you for the better. 

Practice Self-care

Self-care may seem obvious, but many of us do not prioritise this essential part of living. Life is overly busy for most, and completing the mundane to-do list can seem like the most crucial task to accomplish. 

You must learn to be gentle with yourself and listen to your mind and body. Take the time to indulge in long baths, stretch, take up yoga, or enjoy a glass of wine. Look at how you can declutter every aspect of your life. If something doesn’t bring you joy, don’t be scared to let go and move on to more fulfilling pursuits.

Put yourself first and get into the healthy habit of doing so regularly. This action makes us feel far more present and alive in the moment. When we feel awake and content in the current day, mastering how to let go of the past becomes much more accessible. 

Final Thoughts on How to Let Go Of the Past

Learning how to let go of the past and move forward is all about being kind to yourself. Perhaps you’re not in the habit of functioning this way and need constant reminders and affirmations. If so, know that that’s OK, and you’re working on having a healthier relationship with yourself daily. 

Let the negative emotions flow, and never bottle up feelings that don’t serve you and your wellbeing. Whatever happened occurred regardless of the good and the bad parts, and you owe it to yourself to accept and learn how to let go of past mistakes. Dwelling on the past keeps the energy within your soul stagnant and hinders personal growth, only making a potentially tricky situation worse. You can’t always be the hero of every part of your story, so stop trying to be, and look at ways you can become your most authentic self from now on. When we are operating from our higher self, the light starts coming.

If you found reading up on how to let go of the past and move forward helpful, check out 7 harmful myths about PTSD.